July 5, 2012

Eleven Year Streak...over

     Yesterday was America's birthday. Happy Birthday America! We celebrated at the Dunham household with some pool time with me, Jer, Mom and Dad and all the pups. We had a barbecue. A barbecue that ended an eleven year streak of me not eating red meat. For the first time since I bet my Dad eleven years ago that a person COULD live without red meat in their diet, I tried it again. Just a small piece of a kabob. It wasn't THAT bad to be honest, wasn't that good either. But I did it. I am opening up the idea of adding it back in my diet. Of course I made Jeremy's eyes roll when I said I would eat a steak....if it was filet Mignon! ha!!
     I posted my taste test on Facebook and got some funny responses. But I also got a text form a friend that has been with me through all of my struggles with food and it really made me feel good. She told me she saw the post and she was so proud of me.If you are reading this you know who you are...and thank you.
      See, to be honest the eleven year streak wasn't SOLELY to prove my father wrong, although that was most of it, it turned into a distorted thought. I began to think it was bad for you and too fattening and such, and that's why I shouldn't eat it, why I couldn't eat it. But, since I am now giving up all of those beliefs and forcing myself to try new things and give up my habits and beliefs, so goes the ideas over red meat. It will not make me fat. I know PLENTY of healthy, thin, in shape, women (and men) who eat it on a semi-regular basis! So I let it go..and while I am not saying I am eating it all the time, it's not on the forbidden list anymore.
     Another thing that I am giving up is my control over making my own dinner. I tend to get into "food ruts" and cook the same thing over and over. But, this was brought to my attention on Tuesday night by my husband and turned into a (heated) discussion about how I used to let him cook for me. I did and I liked it. But again, I got sucked into the trap of distorted thoughts and behaviors with food. So after much (heated) discussion I told him I would give up (most) of my control and let him cook. All that I asked was that he cook rather healthy (or at least put options there) and that he would let me suggest some recipes to try. He agreed on both accounts and now it's my turn to cooperate and I will.....
     So, that is the progress made so far this week since my last email declaring war against these thoughts and behaviors and my attempt to get better. soon. I think it's pretty good progress for one week if I do say so myself! Today is my Friday so everyone have a fabulous weekend! We will be spending time with Jeremy's parents in Bloomington....who knows what other progress I will make!

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